Boating in the New Year
I hope you all had a lot of fun New Years Eve at your parties, yacht clubs or not. The “Dead End Canal Yacht Club’s” shindig was paid for through the sales of merchandise with our logo so adorned. We bought 5 pound boxes of shrimp from Beach Seafood, smoked Mullet from Maria’s and all the beverages from Winn Dixie. We like to shop locally for our parties.
The good weather and the prospect of free stuff brought out a decent amount of members. We started early because most of us would either be in bed or at another party when the New Year arrived. We held the party in the ‘new motor home garage’ built by ‘Run-aground Ralph.’ It’s now vacant since ‘RAR’ got rid of that behemoth. We overlooked Mrs. RAR’s stipulation that the club rent two porta-johns so we wouldn’t wear out her guest bathrooms. It was a minor concession for such a fine facility.
These gathering always bring out new members and neighbors. Sometimes my head spins from trying to remember all their names. My loving wife says it may also be from the Pabst Blue Ribbon but I doubt it! Anyway, I have taken to writing down the new members’ names, and it seems to work because I remember a whole lot more the next day.
One name I didn’t have to write down to remember was Bob John-something. Half way through the introduction Mrs. Bob John-something says to me, “Have you ever sailed a 27-foot sailboat to Mexico from here?”
I’ve been known, on occasions, to speak before I think, and this is one of those occasions because I said, “I’ve done some really stupid things on and around boats but never have I sailed a 27-foot sailboat to Mexico from here, ha ha!”
Half way through my answer I noticed a pained expression come over Bob John-something’s face. After a brief pause to reflect on the question I realized that Mrs. Bob John-something had been setting me up and, from the gleeful look on her face, I assumed she received the answer for which she was hoping.
Before Bob John-something could walk angrily away, I asked him, “Is this a trip you are planning, Bob?”
He explained that a boyhood friend was going to sail the friend’s 27 footer to Mexico, and he and his friend’s 80-year-old father were going as crew. “They’ve sailed the Chesapeake all their lives and are very confident in the boat and their abilities!”
Trying to undo the hurt I had caused I questioned him very civilly. Where is the boat, I asked? He explained that it was coming down via truck. I asked how long they planned to shake the boat down before they left, and he said they were in a hurry to live his boyhood friend’s dream. I said I thought they should do some sailing in the Gulf of Mexico first. Possibly a trip to the Dry Tortugas was in order.
He repeated that they were in a hurry. I scratched my beard as I usually do when I’m thinking and then realized I had been right in my first assessment. “Bob, are you in good health? I mean could you pass an insurance physical,” I asked. He asked why, and I explained that I wanted to place a bet, an insurance bet. “You make it to Mexico, and I lose. If you don’t, I’ll split the money with your wife!”
After he stormed out of the party I realized my actions had been cruel but sometimes you have to be cruel to make a point as important as that. Up to this point in my life I have been lucky while doing unwise things in boats, but I know of many people who weren’t. Not that an experienced crew can’t sail a small sailboat to Mexico because it’s been done, but not this group.
During the rest of the New Years party I kept one eye out for Bob John-something. I was certain he would return and take a swing at me. I think a swollen lip is worth saving a life or three? Happy New Year!
Boatguy Ed is a retired Marine Industries executive and now volunteers on his son’s Boater’s Treasures TV show. Comments to boatguiEd@aol.com