Boating: Making your lady beautiful through boating
How do you enjoy your boat? Fishing, cruising, harbor tours or as transportation to your favorite waterfront restaurant? It is all perfect!
Cruising, normally is thought of as far off island hopping in exotic locales but the ‘Tween Waters’ resort is especially popular with the “Dead End Canal Yacht Club” members, especially ‘Pensacola Jim’, the club’s ‘Kruising Komadant’ who is an expert in navigating that extensive trip. Part of the allure is the great dock and reservation staff at ‘Tween Waters’ led by another one of our members “Indy Dwayne.”
Now we come to the real reason that our wives allow us to have a boat, waterfront restaurants! Any woman stepping off of a spiffy boat and onto a restaurant’s dock suddenly appears 15 years younger, 20 pounds lighter and ravishingly beautiful. Don’t scoff, it’s a fact! Prove it to yourself by spending an afternoon dockside at one of the plethora of waterfront restaurants.
You may not know any of those ladies but you will recognize their nautical radiance. It may be the rose colored glasses that you are looking through because of your surroundings or that the ladies have their head held high and exude an air of confidence but the effect is real. The wind in their hair, the glow from the salt spray, the $150 sunglasses and the anticipation of a wonderful meal is the reason they look so good!
All you male boaters should cut out the previous two paragraphs and tape it to your ladies’ mirror! She will never complain about another fishing trip again! No, I don’t think women are that shallow but it couldn’t hurt in the ongoing battle to keep the boat!
“Water, water everywhere but not a drop to drink.” So much for the Ancient Mariner but certainly not around Fort Myers Beach. So many watering holes means the pure joy of dining, drinking and having a great time. You will certainly make up your own mind.
Visit them by land first and watch other boaters dock before you try it. Remember, if you bring your boat to a complete stop but the restaurant is still moving sideways and you don’t have a clue, you will quickly become part of the entertainment as you attempt to dock.
The beauty of having so many waterfront places is that we have so many choices! And these waterfront restaurants can’t rest just on their view as in many areas. Besides the dazzling view they must serve great food consistently.
I, boatguy Ed, am considered somewhat troublesome by some restaurateurs because I like my food a certain way. Fish should be fresh and local without a cream sauce. Chicken wings should be crispy but not overcooked like small blocks of soft pine dipped into wing sauce and draft beer should be cold, served in the same glass. I’d prefer Pabst Blue Ribbon but I will settle for a Bud-Lightning; half Bud Light and half Yuengling.
The author of this column has never been institutionalized to the best of his recollection. Contact him at boatguiEd@aol.com and don’t forget to buy local; fish, shrimp and bottom paint!